Tragic, disturbing events - whether in your personal life or in the world around you - can have a paralyzing effect, say mental health experts. The good news is, the Sept. 11 terror attacks made more people aware of mental health issues and now they are more likely to seek help. Talking about anxiety and stress, and learning how to cope, is essential for regaining and maintaining a sense of control in these situations.

Sources: Associated Press, Mental Health Association (Maryland), National Mental Health Association, National Institute of Mental Health

# Talk. Whether it's a friend, family member, doctor, religious advisor or mental health professional, discovering that someone else shares your feelings is often enough to reduce anxiety.

# Maintain control over those things that you can, by keeping as much of a normal routine as possible.

# Recall other times you have experienced strong emotions and how they were resolved.

# Limit your television news viewing. Sitting in front of the set waiting for the next development can be detrimental to those who are already feeling overwhelmed by events.

# Look to places of worship and community groups for support.

# It's OK to keep family members close by and accounted for, but try not to overreact.

# Do something for someone else, or volunteer - it can improve your frame of mind.

# Do things that you find relaxing and soothing.

# Talk to your kids about their feelings. Encourage them to express their feelings by talking, drawing or playing.

# Validate children's feelings. Let them know that serious acts of violence are not common, which is why incidents such as the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks attract so much media attention. Limit television viewing if necessary, and watch news reports together.

# Don't be afraid to admit that you can't answer all of their questions.

# Talk honestly about your own feelings regarding violence. It is important for children to recognize they are not dealing with their fears alone, and that adults can also be affected.

# Discuss the safety procedures that are in place at your children's school, in your neighborhood, and in other public places. Ensure that your kids know how to reach you (or another family member or friend) in case of crisis.

# Empower children to take action regarding their safety. Encourage them to report specific incidents (such as bullying, threats or talk of suicide) and to develop problem-solving and conflict-resolution skills.

# Keep the dialogue going and make safety a common topic in family discussions rather than just a response to an immediate crisis.

# Seek help when necessary. If you are worried about a child's reaction, or have ongoing concerns about his or her behavior or emotions, contact your pediatrician or a mental health professional at school or at your community mental health center.

# ADULTS Disbelief and shock, sometimes followed by overwhelming guilt and self-doubt

# Fear of leaving the house, fear and anxiety about the future

# Trouble with sleeping, poor concentration/communication, disorientation, apathy and emotional numbing

# Emotional responses such as irritability, anger, sadness and depression

# Headaches and stomach problems, colds or flu-like symptoms

# Increased use of drugs/alcohol

# Frequent worrying; talk of death or suicide; increased tearfulness, and irritability or anger

# Fearfulness about leaving the house or going to school

# Loss of interest in friends and activities

# Difficulty concentrating

# Persistent nightmares

# In older children, regressive behavior

National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) has information on post-traumatic stress disorder and other anxiety disorders: 1-88-88-ANXIETY

American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry: 202-966-7300

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration: 800-879-6682